Others actions do not determine your self worth
Repeat this, underline, bold it, mentally ink it til you memorize it.
On a previous Instagram post, I wrote about the illusion of perfection. I basically fell to the notion that I needed to consistently excel in order to feel “worthy” or credible as a person, that this applied to all areas: my behavior, my looks, the way others perceived me. Guess what, this mode of thinking was just toxic at best.
The way others treat us, behave towards us, or our time with them isn’t a reflection of your self worth. Do not question or doubt your value or hustle based on what someone thinks or their actions toward you. Here’s why: your opinion comes first, your worth isn’t dictated by your relationship status, your net worth, your past, or the media. Do not submit to thinking that you have to change for others to fit in a box. Personally I believe we should continually be growing, progressing, and evolving for ourselves. Some of us were not given that golden principle to: cultivate your own happiness. Some of us are scared to do it. Some of us think we have to look a certain way to get it, but this is truly false.
But here’s the thing: anyone’s heart can get broken, anyone’s past can be be one that they really had to struggle to overcome, and anyone’s life can take some different route years down the line. All of this is regardless of how they look, how successful they’ve become, or any stigmas they face. Do not believe you must look a certain way, fit into a certain size, or have a particular lifestyle to receive happiness.
Do not lose yourself trying to please others for validation or merit. You are in charge of defining your self worth & let me tell y’all, it’s not easy. It’s not easy to be our own cheerleader, our own best friend at the end of the day, or even our own critic. Sometimes its just easier to go about letting others pinpoint that compass for us but factually, it’s an incorrect analysis. If you are like me, begin by acknowledging the need for external validation. Then begin the process of why this habit or thinking is present in your life. Perhaps some of us may need therapy, a good friend or family member to get to the undercurrent but I believe its essential to get in touch with these emotions and inner needs.
This is incredibly important to me because I used to be that girl. The girl that felt like she failed others when she couldn’t save or fix. Do not miss out on curating the life you want – not the image but the actual experiences & motions.
Here’s what matters: your heart, how you treat others, how you treat yourself. You can be beautiful regardless who is or isn’t in your life. You as an individual have a passion inside you and its incredibly important for you to channel it and tap it into reality. Work on yourself as an individual and take the time to remember you are never alone, you will always have your own back. Make no mistake that community is important but the people we surround ourselves with should be: encouraging, patient, honest, and trustworthy. This is incredibly important to me because I used to be that girl. The girl that felt like she failed others when she couldn’t save or fix. The girl that felt her friendships Do not miss out on curating the life you want – not the image but the actual experiences & bonds that will sustain you.
Love yourself. Let others be in awe of much you love and respect yourself. Let them see how the phoenix rises from the ashes, with the utmost beauty and strength.